5 Ways to Get Over Someone You Love

So, there’s this guy that I love that I just can’t be with. Ladies, you’ve probably been there before. Guys, you’ve probably had to let go of a special lady at some point. Perhaps she was “the one that got away.” There are some people we cross paths with in life that we can’t be with for one reason or another. Perhaps it’s bad timing and God is telling you to grow apart from the person until you can grow together. Maybe it’s a matter of focus. You can’t be with him or her right now because God needs your full-time focus on another area of your life. Sometimes God gives us a flat out no for an individual. Maybe he or she isn’t the spouse God has in mind for you. They aren’t His Plan A choice.

Getting over someone you love is never easy. It can be heart-wrenching when the heart wants to park somewhere, and God is saying, “Child, put this thing in drive. I’ve got places for you to go!” If we’re going to reach our spiritual destinies, God needs our undivided attention. This calls for us to let go of all distractions, so we can focus on our present journeys and future promised lands. Here are five Godly ways to get over someone you love.

1. Prayer – Prayer is huge in helping you get over someone. Talk to God about the way you feel and ask Him for help. Don't ignore your feelings and leave them bottled inside. God is listening. He knows what you're feeling better than you do, and He’ll help you through this difficult season with such love and grace. He will give you instructions on how to proceed. Be sure to follow all He says to the letter. What should you pray for? Pray for God to shift your focus to what He'd have you to think on and do at this time. Ask God to clear your heart, mind, emotions (soul) of anything negative. Ask Him to give you a clean heart and renew a right spirit within you (Psalm 51:10). If the breakup was bad, ask God for proper perspective. Ask Him to help you forgive yourself and the other person, and to remove any unforgiveness or ill will from your heart.

2. Fasting – When you’re fasting to get over someone, you put this person on God’s altar in your heart. You can give up food, entertainment, or whatever God leads you to surrender as a symbol of your sacrifice. When you do this, God begins to perform surgery on your heart over time. He’ll remove the stony places and make them flesh again (Ezekiel 36:26). He’ll point out areas to you where you need to grow and change. (No, everything wasn’t his or her fault!) He’ll refresh, renew, and restore you. This is where your internal, spiritual healing process begins.

3. Time – They say time heals all wounds. I say God heals all wounds over time. It took time to fall in love with the person, and it will take time for your heart to move on. Allow yourself to feel whatever you need to. Don’t beat yourself up for taking too much time. Everyone is different. Also, everything is not as it seems. Some people appear to have gotten over someone in a breeze, but they could be putting on a front for others. They may look totally fine on the outside, but inside they are torn up. Don’t trust what you see on social media. People front on there for a living. LOL. Don’t compare how quick someone else moved on to how quickly you should move on. Allow your heart the time it needs to heal. Honor yourself and your heart. The time it takes to heal is not as important as how you spend the time. What you do during your healing process is key. No moping around eating bowls of Häagen-Dazs, watching sappy soap operas is allowed after five days! Ha.

4. Space – This is probably one of the biggest keys in getting over someone. It’s so much easier getting over someone when you don’t have to see or talk to them often. Put as much space as possible between you and the individual you need to forget. This allows you to properly process your feelings and get over them. In some cases, space is just not possible. Maybe you work with the person, go to church with them, or worse case scenario, have kids with them. In these cases, it’s nearly impossible to keep your distance. If this fits your situation, you won’t be able to use space; still, areas 1-3 will apply to you. Prayer and fasting will be your biggest lifelines in these cases.

5. Good Friends – There’s nothing like hanging out with good, Godly friends to help you get over someone. I’m not talking about just any type of friends. But, true friends you can keep it real with and open up to. Ones that will listen without judging, and love on you, and help you get your mind off lover boy or lover girl. One rule applies here: Don’t wear your friends out with too many stories about your ex. It will drive them crazy, and they’ll tire of you quickly! Reach out to them in this time of need and ask for help. Godly friends can give you a Godly word, and the best kind will pray, fast, and even cry with you. Ask them for prayer. Intercession will help you greatly during this time. Don’t try to go it alone if you have Godsends in your life to help. If you don’t have any Godly friends, talk to Jesus. He’s the Friend that will stick closer to you than a brother (Proverbs 18:24). He’s worth more than 10 of the greatest friends. Ask Him to send you a couple Godly friends, and wait on Him to send them. When they come, still go to Him first about everything.

What are some ways you've used to get over someone you needed to let go of? Please share below. I would love to hear what’s worked for you, and I’m sure others would as well.

In His Service,

Kaila